Whoomp! There It Is.

3 Apr

April 3, 2013

Loves

iPhone stickers: Adorable. Take my money. Also, call Lisa Frank and tell her she’s needed.

Which one of you queens is going to buy me a Cabernet at the gay dog bar?

Apparently, taking a walk in the park makes your brain less lollygaggy.

More proof that drinking red wine every night makes you healthy, not an alcoholic.

The weirdest marriage equality signs on the internet. Because nobody loves a supportive movement more than memes.

The pot smoke has settled and Rihanna has seen the light! Looks like she and Chris Brown are finished.

Hates

Wait. WTF. Chris Brown and Rihanna might be getting married? If she’s dumb enough to do that, I hope he wears this terrible shirt to the reception. It is NOT going to photograph well.

It took me YEARS to get over my fear of bees after My Girl. Now you’re telling me THIS?

Go home, James Franco. You’re drunk.

Running into the same mean old lady EVERY day in my office’s tiny kitchen. No link, just a gripe. She eats what looks to be baby food and makes judgey eyes at my Lean Cuisines. LAY OFF ME, I’M STARVING (myself. I’m literally starving myself).

Kim Kardashian’s maternity wear: I don’t care how curvy she gets. I just feel like these outfits are suffocating her AND her unborn child somehow.

I have said it before and I’ll said it again: I refuse to believe that culottes are back.

Do Me

Cheryl’s Weekend at Basquiat’s (Friday, April 5th @ Music Hall of Williamsburg): I definitely don’t remember the days of New York when “girls just wanted to have fun, people were dancing on the ceiling, and George Michael was straight,” but I WANT TO GO THERE.

Brooklyn Flea! It’s back (Saturday, April 6th @ 10am, officially). Which means that hipsters wearing tight black jeans in 90 degree weather are RIGHT around the corner!

Eat Me

Oreo Truffle Stuffed Cupcakes. There’s almost nothing I’d rather put in my mouth. [I already beat you to the “That’s what she said” joke, so don’t even bother … but definitely still laugh about it.]

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